Sunday, August 1, 2010

My love affair

So far, it is only stealing glances, the occasional fondling, and yes, soft and gentle caressing. And as soon as I am done with my current two-year relationship, I will break free and make all of my wildest dreams come true!

"Move over", Blackberry on Verizon and "Hello", iPhone on AT&T!

I am completely and utterly smitten with the new iPhone 4G. This yearning can only be matched by the one I had in 1975 for the alluring and playful convertible VW bug. Although that relationship never came to fruition, I am determined to make this one happen. The only thing standing in my way is this darned contract with my current wireless carrier and my problem-plagued Blackberry Storm.

Oh sure, I went through the usual relationship process getting to know Storm. At first I was excited and blinded by the new technology. But then I gradually came to realize that I was in a relationship with something that didn't fit my needs or my lifestyle, was constantly "glitching" and ignoring calls, and was an all-around disappointment.

Just to be clear, I am not a "grass is always greener" sort of person. I've done my investigation into this new  uber-cool iPhone technological beauty and it is something worth having.  My Blackberry, on the other hand, is a huge disaster. I am currently on my 5th replacement of the same model. Granted, one of the occurrences was my fault and I definitely had no intention of falling into a stream with it, but all of the others are because this phone is a huge dud.

No more "Can you hear me now?" utterances will ever escape my lips. I promise to be true and faithful and to always take care of it with the utmost attention. Apple, you are brilliant! I am already a Mac convert, own a iTouch, and will soon (uh, ten more months and counting) be a proud owner of the smartest phone to ever be made. If you don't believe me, you can check it out here. Antenna issues? Pshew. Please, what phone doesn't have reception or antenna issues?

This phone relationship will be forever. Unless of course an affordable version of a Dick Tracy-type watch-phone comes around.  I bet you Apple will be the ones to come out with it.

Saturday, July 31, 2010

The screamer

I have a screamer that lives next door to me.  I am guessing that she is about 10 years old and I think the cause of much of her woes is that she has several older brothers. Now, I get the frustration that siblings bring at that age. I also get that some people need to vent their frustration in some manner. What I don't get is how it can go on and on and on and...


I mean, where is the rest of the family while this rant is happening? Do they just tune her out and pretend that it isn't taking place? Remember, I live in Hawaii where multi-generational domiciles are more than common.  There is a very minuscule probability that there are not several other relatives at home at each given moment when a tantrum of this type is occurring. Don't they mind? Do they have sand in their ears?  Are they investors in cotton, earmuff, and earplug companies?


What I also don't get is the actual need to scream. I must be missing some female gene that dictates that every girl must scream starting at around the age of 2.  I see girls screaming with delight at the playground. I see teens screaming as they look on in teen-adoration at their teen-idols. I even see grown women screaming in either fear or excitement at something as simple as squirting water.  I, myself, am not a screamer.


Oh, I do exclaim the occasion "Oh!" or "@$?&!", but never a full-blown blood curdling scream. 


Hold on a minute. I think I do remember a time when I let out a throat-burning, lung-deflating, scream of terror. I was just about ten years old (the same age as my neighbor), on the verge of drifting off to sleep.  My older sister jumped into the doorway of my room (dark silhouette backlit from the hallway) and in a menacing voice yelled "TARANTULA" with her arms thrown wide. I remember I sat bolt-upright in bed, eyes popping, screaming bloody-murder. Even the thought of it makes my neck ache a bit.


Yes, that may have contributed to my life-long phobia of spiders, but it did not send me down the road of being a serial screamer. Luckily, I think I may have passed this missing scream-gene proclivity on to each of my two daughters; it was a blissful and peaceful time at the playground with them. No ear-piercing shrills, or deafening tantrums.


My young neighbor, on the other hand, is perfecting her skill at every opportunity.  With the aid of her brothers, she will be ready to enter into the Banshee Hall of Fame at a very early age. And she will know people far and wide who will be able to verify her claim.  Lord, have mercy.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Are Wii having fun yet?

Normally, I think of myself as being an agile and well-coordinated person. But, as of late, I have discovered that I am no good at snow-boarding, floating in a bubble down a stream, or riding a Segway on the beach. But, on the other hand, I am really good at hula-hoops, kung fu, and flying like a bird.


And, my wings are feeling very tired.


I have discovered the wonderful world of Wii Fit Plus. Not being of the "gaming generation" this is all fairly new to me.  We are talking about a virtual yoga instructor as well as a sassy cartoon that tells you that you are not only obese (according to medical standards, of course), but automatically adjusts your Mii caricature to reflect your plumpness.


Not feeling daunted by the Nintendo manual that warns of seizures, eye strain, motion sickness, and damage to your console or TV screen, I leapt onto the Wii Fit Board and began my journey into wellness. 


"DO NOT JUMP ON THE BOARD" the screen warns me as it puts me back at the beginning of my routine. Shoot, I thought I was doing so well.  "STEP IN TIME TO THE MUSIC" it then screams at me. Wait a minute, I was in perfect sync. It is the carpeting under the board that is screwing with the results. "SO, BALANCE GAMES AREN'T YOUR CUP OF TEA", the screen consoles me, "KEEP WORKING AT IT", it placates.


So far my injuries have been minor; feet tangling with the edge of the board as I attempt to step on and off in time to the music, a sore elbow from trying to hit home runs, and a very bruised ego.


The dogs have learned to flee the room when they see The Board being laid out on the floor, and I'm wishing that I actually had curtains on the windows. But, my personal trainer is very encouraging and never laughs at me; at least to my face. For all I know this thing is hooked up to some central Wii Fit Headquarters where virtual trainers compare whose "client" is least coordinated or who is not in first place, but rather, who is in millionth place.


Overall, I am having a blast with this thing and it will all be worth it as I whittle away layers of exercise apathy and shed pounds of inert activity. Besides, I take comfort in knowing that I at least look better in person than all those little Mii characters that I am in fierce competition with.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Life and Death


As my daughter so succinctly put it, “Life is always fatal”. At its base level, it is easy to understand that yes, we all must die one day. But, seeing it Up-Close-And-Personal during my recent trip to Oregon and Idaho saying goodbye to family, knowing this fact doesn’t make it any easier on those left behind.

Certainly, life is a journey. Although this is an oft-overused cliché, it is absolutely true.  It is an ongoing quest to develop physically, mentally, and spiritually.  It is a journey fraught with danger as well as delights; filled with friendships, family, and sometimes heartbreaks. But it is a journey we all must take. If we are lucky, this trip will take generations to complete.  For others, it must come to an end sooner.

And, as we approach the end of our journey, or are forced to face the end of our loved-one’s journey, it is a time to contemplate whether every road taken was the right one.  Wouldn’t it be wonderful to look back on your life and not have one single regret?

But to contemplate regret is actually to admit that no action was taken after determining that a wrong turn was taken. It is so easy to just sit back and ride that slippery slope into a lifetime of “what-ifs”. 

Through all of this introspective time, I have determined that my new year starts now. I have resolved that I will no longer let life happen merely to me. I will go and make life happen for me.  Every mistake I make is mine and I had better wise-up and learn from each one of them. Go for the gusto, grab for the brass ring.

Death will come for me; I have no doubt about that.  Although I might not be ready for it, when it does come I want it to say, “GOOD JOB. NICELY DONE.  LETS GO NOW”.  And, I’ll have no regrets. How about you?


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Saturday, July 3, 2010

The Wish Tree

Today I went to a an event at a Asian marketplace that they called the "Oregon Summer Fest". It was a gala affair with hot-cooked noodles, lots of kimonos, an Asian band doing covers of the Jackson 5 and Elvis, and, best of all, a Wish Tree.


A Wish Tree is an individual tree, usually distinguished by species, position or appearance, which is used as an object of wishes and offerings. Such trees are identified as possessing a special religious or spiritual value. By tradition, believers make votive offerings in order to gain from that nature spirit, saint, or goddess, fulfillment of a wish (yes, I looked this up on Wikipedia).


In this case, it was a small bamboo tree in a pot, moved into the parking lot area, easily accessible to the masses. The point of the Wishing Tree was to write down your wish and hang it from the tree. Today, it was even made more special for us non-asian or japanese-speaking revelers by having someone read the wish and write on the back of it the same wish in Japanese. How cool is that?! A double-whammy wish!


Anyway, I decided to go with the whole "fate gives you what you ask" philosophy, backed by the fortune cookie I just received last night at Panda Express (which clearly stated that I will have a comfortable life). So, I bought a Power Ball ticket and made a wish. Yes, it is flapping in the light breeze, in both English and Japanese, summoning the great spirits to shower wealth upon me (as well as good health and happiness).


I'll let you know how it turns out.


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Monday, June 21, 2010

What My Father Gave To Me


My dad was descendant from Nordic and German stock, which translated into English means that he worked extremely hard at everything he did. Although achieved later in life, I get my work ethic from him.

In high school, he wasn’t much into sports, but could outrun most of the track team. He did high diving, until he broke his eardrums. I could always picture, in my mind, all six feet of him jack-knifing from 20 feet in the air. He was an excellent swimmer and tried to teach all of us how to do the crawl. I wasn’t much interested in learning how to swim properly; I was more interested in climbing onto his stomach as he floated there on his back with even his toes sticking out of the water. I get my buoyancy from him.

At 19, he enlisted in the Marines. Looking dapper in his uniform, he met my mom at Cal Berkeley at a social event. They danced, and romanced, and later they wrote. The jitterbug was his favorite. I get my sense of rhythm from him.

After the war, he came back and, with a fever and temperature of 103, was married to Margery May Fowler, his redheaded true love from Berkeley. They moved to Seattle, where, on the GI Bill, he went to the University of Washington and got an Electrical Engineering degree. He had wanted to be an architect and work with his contractor-father, but his dad had died suddenly of a heart attack a few years earlier and his dream of building a business with his dad had died as well. I get my ability to overcome adversity from him.

They made plenty of friends during these early years in Washington, and for entertainment, they would flip their living room coffee table on its side, and all sit on the floor to use it as a net for balloon volleyball.  I get my playful nature from him.

After college, he was hired by Pacific Bell, and entered on a management “fast track”. As our family grew so did the number of times we moved: Washington, California, Washington (where I came along), New Jersey, New York, Oregon, Washington, Oregon, Washington, then, finally, Oregon. He was able to hold us all together even though our roots were not allowed to grow very deep. I get my wanderlust from him.

Higher and higher in management he went. This had its perks for our family. We got the first Princess phone, the first push-button phone, the first intercom connected to a phone system, eventually we each got a phone in our own room; we got to see what silicon discs were cut from, we got to see the first micro-chips; the wonders never ceased. I couldn’t wait for each new invention to make its way into my dad’s hands to be shared with our tiny minds.  I get my tech savvy-ness from him.

One of my fondest memories is of watching my dad construct a train table for “us”. This was a massive affair made from two-by-fours and plywood. It cleverly hinged in the middle so that the whole thing could be easily folded up and rolled out of the way. He spent hours gluing grass and roads. He constructed little houses, tiny train stations, miniature car garages, and small stores. Trees of different species were selected and placed.  Tiny villagers were hand-painted in the many hues of ethnic diversity. Ahh, the smell of those model paints was intoxicating (probably literally). I’m not sure about my sisters, but I claimed a favorite house, car, and even miniature people. Each item had a special place on the table and I remembered being insistent that each time we set it up everything had to go back where it belonged. I get my attention to detail from him.

Eventually my dad retired but things did not slow down for him. Not only did he spend many hours on various boards and committees, but also had a role in a cutting-edge technology start-up company. Imagine storing information from your computer on a thin round disc that could be erased and written on again! Too bad it was before its time. This technology (CDs and DVDs) eventually hit the market about 8 years later. My dad was always ahead of the curve. I get my entrepreneurial ideals from him.

I could stand before you today and talk for hours about what an outstanding father, mentor, and friend my dad was. He always had a smile and hug for anyone he met. His generosity was epic, his capacity to love, endless. He laughed with us and allowed us to drag him on “adventures”. He once let us talk him into trying some toffee, which, after one prolonged un-sticking of the first bite, pulled the bridge right out of his mouth. In true form, he laughed right along with the rest of us. I get my joy and appreciation for humor from him.

There are other traits and talents that my father had that I wished I had acquired: patience, tolerance, acceptance, the ability to complete tasks, ambidexterity, a low golf handicap, the ability to tan, and last but not least, the ability to do the crawl.

He is one-of-a-kind and will be missed by everyone who knew him. He played with us, he taught us, he respected us, he laughed with us, he encouraged us, he applauded us, and he supported us. We could not have asked for a more loving father and all of us are truly blessed to have had his influence in our lives.

Sunday, June 6, 2010

Making sense of the census

I am dutiful and law abiding. That is why, when I got my census questionnaire in the mail and reading that it would only take me ten minutes to fill it out, I sat down immediately and divulged all of my intimate secrets.

How many in my household? One, plus two dogs I consider my babies, and way too many crawly things. Income? Yes, but not enough. Heritage? Yep, got plenty of that. There. Done with that… and there it sat, on my table for another week. Then I realized there was free postage on that envelope. I scooped it up and dropped it in the mailbox. Finally, a citizen in good standing. I could now say that I helped build schools, playgrounds, hospitals, roads, improved the infrastructure of my community, and left my genealogical footprint.

So, why was there a flyer on my front door yesterday saying that “Michael” had stopped by from the Census Bureau to help me fill out my census? Oh, maybe because in my rush to utilize Federal dollars to mail a letter I forgot to actually place my filled out census form into it!

Educational level? Apparently wasted.